Human beings are the most amazing creation. Homo Sapiens have been endowed with a beautiful anatomy, gorgeous eyes, values of being honest, loyal, sincere, and truthful; and a mind, which helps them believe so. Most of all, I believe it’s the power of speech, that separates us from the others. We have the power to speak with intonations and languages that even domestic cockroaches have mastered (on second thoughts, are there any wild ones left?).
The human talk, for better or worse, has now got a wider reach. With dozens of University backed Professors, Techies and Management teachers; the astrology quacks of India are planning to go on an indefinite strike against such monopoly. It is rumored that Bill Gates is being roped in as a consultant for Disaster Management.
But there is no need for these astro-men to panic. The fact is that these ‘Speech Gurus’ have some unique techniques while speaking that the ever sealed-to-ground sadhus can never master.
Many speakers for some reason try to get personal through their talk. They make it a point to get a reassurance from the audience by saying, “You know…” No, I don’t! On one occasion, the speaker went on to explain concepts of e-governance, which at that point was a rather new topic for the young audience. Every now and then, in the middle of the sentence, he let the talk hang loose by saying, “E-governance is very important for any company to adopt, you know…” Well yes, the turkey on your head flew over and told me so. Mercy! Some speakers don’t let go of this indispensable phrase even during Q&A session. A person from the audience asks you for clarifications and the last thing he expects is to be told, “O yes, you know …” God save!
Another habit that puts the audience in discomfort, is the unnecessary use of conjunctions. The ‘And’ factor. Brevity is the soul of humor and good talk. But some people just don’t get it. When a person starts speaking with all might on the subject and explains the concepts as nobody does and is frequently hit by “You know…” obsession and further has no consideration for the audience who by now are sick and tired of listening and desperately want a break that may save their life from the clutches of unending conjunctions, you may be left with just two options – kill the speaker (mostly visualized in your mind) or sue him for the trauma caused by a sentence! Phew!
Many speeches are cases of classic bloopers. Either the speaker forgets where he/ she started or the paper from which it was read out flies away by a gust of unwanted breeze. Those who are inadept in covering up the slip, resort to the forefathers’ language of monosyllables. The ‘Ah-s’ and ‘Uhm-s’ come in handy and sometimes are stretched far beyond the threshold of endurance. The cleverer lot understand the side effects of such sounds and use convenient words like “to explain briefly” and “without getting deep” more often than the coups in Africa. If the blooper happens during a group discussion, there’s no stopping the speaker who goes on and on saying “as my friend said”. Recently in a webinar that I attended, this fixation proved to be a savior to the COO of a large BPO company. The ‘friend’ in question was a PR consultant who spoke flawlessly. Is this what it means when they say, “What are friends for!”
Speakers who extensively use colorful presentations sure attract many people as audience. But many suffer from what I call the “Presenter-Presentation Mismatch”. The audience waits for the speaker to explain the slide but either he hates the slide or is under the trance of a blooper and is trying hard to cover it up. If it is neither, then it’s just that, a mismatch.
There are some others who are masters, at feigning. In a surge to create an indelible impression, they speak in some bizarre accent. Either it is foreign education gone bad or excessive influence of sitcom stars that make the speech sound like a hotchpotch spout! Others, who for some reasons cannot put on an accent (thank god for that!), try using statistics and jargons or spew vocabulary. This is either to intimidate the audience to the degree that they don’t ask any questions or to divert their minds from the actual subject. Malcolm Forbes had once said – “It’s more fun to arrive at a conclusion than to justify it”. These presenters seem to have taken the quote a bit too seriously! So, if someone is speaking about the epistemology related to the GDT techniques, which have been expediently implemented to gain the HHI advantage in a foreign market, don’t panic if you are lost. The speaker is verbally challenged to speak about the nature of a manufacturing communications technique, which can be used to gain a better market concentration, in simple terms. And in most cases, the speaker is also as lost as his audience!
To conclude briefly, it is said that 90% of the statistics are made-up on the spot. So if you have found my critique rather humdrum, you may keep your ferocity to self and post approbation about the erudition soon. (Send me your bouquets and spare yourself the thought of brickbats!)
The human talk, for better or worse, has now got a wider reach. With dozens of University backed Professors, Techies and Management teachers; the astrology quacks of India are planning to go on an indefinite strike against such monopoly. It is rumored that Bill Gates is being roped in as a consultant for Disaster Management.
But there is no need for these astro-men to panic. The fact is that these ‘Speech Gurus’ have some unique techniques while speaking that the ever sealed-to-ground sadhus can never master.
Many speakers for some reason try to get personal through their talk. They make it a point to get a reassurance from the audience by saying, “You know…” No, I don’t! On one occasion, the speaker went on to explain concepts of e-governance, which at that point was a rather new topic for the young audience. Every now and then, in the middle of the sentence, he let the talk hang loose by saying, “E-governance is very important for any company to adopt, you know…” Well yes, the turkey on your head flew over and told me so. Mercy! Some speakers don’t let go of this indispensable phrase even during Q&A session. A person from the audience asks you for clarifications and the last thing he expects is to be told, “O yes, you know …” God save!
Another habit that puts the audience in discomfort, is the unnecessary use of conjunctions. The ‘And’ factor. Brevity is the soul of humor and good talk. But some people just don’t get it. When a person starts speaking with all might on the subject and explains the concepts as nobody does and is frequently hit by “You know…” obsession and further has no consideration for the audience who by now are sick and tired of listening and desperately want a break that may save their life from the clutches of unending conjunctions, you may be left with just two options – kill the speaker (mostly visualized in your mind) or sue him for the trauma caused by a sentence! Phew!
Many speeches are cases of classic bloopers. Either the speaker forgets where he/ she started or the paper from which it was read out flies away by a gust of unwanted breeze. Those who are inadept in covering up the slip, resort to the forefathers’ language of monosyllables. The ‘Ah-s’ and ‘Uhm-s’ come in handy and sometimes are stretched far beyond the threshold of endurance. The cleverer lot understand the side effects of such sounds and use convenient words like “to explain briefly” and “without getting deep” more often than the coups in Africa. If the blooper happens during a group discussion, there’s no stopping the speaker who goes on and on saying “as my friend said”. Recently in a webinar that I attended, this fixation proved to be a savior to the COO of a large BPO company. The ‘friend’ in question was a PR consultant who spoke flawlessly. Is this what it means when they say, “What are friends for!”
Speakers who extensively use colorful presentations sure attract many people as audience. But many suffer from what I call the “Presenter-Presentation Mismatch”. The audience waits for the speaker to explain the slide but either he hates the slide or is under the trance of a blooper and is trying hard to cover it up. If it is neither, then it’s just that, a mismatch.
There are some others who are masters, at feigning. In a surge to create an indelible impression, they speak in some bizarre accent. Either it is foreign education gone bad or excessive influence of sitcom stars that make the speech sound like a hotchpotch spout! Others, who for some reasons cannot put on an accent (thank god for that!), try using statistics and jargons or spew vocabulary. This is either to intimidate the audience to the degree that they don’t ask any questions or to divert their minds from the actual subject. Malcolm Forbes had once said – “It’s more fun to arrive at a conclusion than to justify it”. These presenters seem to have taken the quote a bit too seriously! So, if someone is speaking about the epistemology related to the GDT techniques, which have been expediently implemented to gain the HHI advantage in a foreign market, don’t panic if you are lost. The speaker is verbally challenged to speak about the nature of a manufacturing communications technique, which can be used to gain a better market concentration, in simple terms. And in most cases, the speaker is also as lost as his audience!
To conclude briefly, it is said that 90% of the statistics are made-up on the spot. So if you have found my critique rather humdrum, you may keep your ferocity to self and post approbation about the erudition soon. (Send me your bouquets and spare yourself the thought of brickbats!)
(June 15, 2005)
1 comment:
superb ... publish this...
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